J.O.Y. to the World

Back before I had knee surgery and a daughter, I used to be a runner. And, as any runner will tell you, there exists what is known as a "runner's high"-- a blast of endorphins that kicks in after about 20 - 25 minutes of running-- that can make the 2nd half of a run seem even easier than the first. So exhilarating is this boost, that at times I would be able to finish a run in a dead sprint.

Unfortunately, many runners don't push past the pain of the first 10 - 20 minutes to experience the benefit of this natural energy kick.

There is also something to be said for the phenomenon of getting more and more excited for something the closer we get to receiving it. To further this idea of a run, knowing that the end is in sight (or at least close) can inspire one to pick up the pace incrementally, running at full tilt for the last few strides.

With Christmas only a day away, stores will be buzzing with last minute shoppers, children will be giddy in anticipation of their hopeful Christmas loot, churches will be packed with people dressed in their finest clothes, radio stations will broadcast non-stop carols, gas stations will jack up prices to rob holiday travelers, airports will be bustling.

The excitement will practically be palpable.

People will be filled with joy.

But, will they be filled with J.O.Y.? Will they put Jesus first, Others second and Themselves last?

J.O.T.? Er, to make the acronym functional, will you:

Put Jesus first?

Put Others second?

Put Yourself last?

On this last day of Advent, I offer one more example of how we should prepare for Christ's birth given to us over the course of the past four weeks: Jesus' earthly father, Joseph.

Joseph was a man about whom little is known (at least from Scripture). But, it may be safe to say that Joseph lived by this motto: "Put Jesus first, Others second and Yourself last." He decided to follow the advice of the angel, taking Mary as his wife and raising Jesus as his own.

He decided to honor and uphold Mary's dignity, choosing to marry her despite the unusual circumstances of her pregnancy.

He decided to put his own desires for a "normal" marriage and experience as a father aside and instead be joyful. In return, he had the blessing of spending the rest of his life with Jesus. Imagine that. Imagine the joy you experience when in the presence of your spouse or your child(ren) or your best friend. Now, imagine that person to be Jesus! What joy you would undoubtedly experience!

However, will we be filled with J.O.Y. tomorrow when Christ once again comes into our world? Will we be so overcome with joy to sing at the top of our lungs, "Joy to the world! The Lord has come! Let Earth receive her King!" Heaven will be singing. Will nature?

Like the song says, "Let every heart prepare Him room." If we have done that, if we have pushed past the pain of crowded shopping malls and endless holiday tasks and found time to pray, offered more of ourselves to those in need (even within our own families), spent more time thinking about what we can give instead of what we want to receive-- if we have truly prepared and made room for Jesus to be the most important part of our lives-- then let us not be ashamed to spread J.O.Y. tomorrow and every day of our lives. Let us sing, "Joy to the world!"

Let us not be afraid to put Jesus first tomorrow. Let us be enlivened in putting others second. And let us truly believe that in doing so, and in putting ourselves last, we may come to experience everlasting joy. J.O.Y. that is independent of circumstances, J.O.Y. that is constant. J.O.Y. that leads us from a birth in a dirty stable, to a cross on a hill, to a grave with a stone rolled away...

"...and nature sing, and heaven and nature sing, and heaven and heaven and nature sing!"

Joy to the world.

J.O.Y. to the world, indeed.

Just Say Yes

Because of its juxtaposition to the word "no", the word "yes" is inherently positive.

Think about this. While there are some questions for which a "yes" response brings bad news or rejection (So, does that mean you don't want to go out with me?), more often than not, hearing a "yes" is a good thing.

"Can I go to Matt's house for a sleepover?"

"Are we going out to eat tonight?"

"Can I stay up past bedtime?"

"Will you marry me?"

Imagining a "yes" response to any of these or countless other questions, brings with it the hope, excitement and joy surrounding those situations. So close is the connection between the word "yes" and good feelings that simply saying "yes" with a little flair ("YESSSSSS!" maybe even with a fist shake or elbow pump) can heighten one's mode.

There are probably monumental yeses in your life ("Yes, I'll marry you", "Yes, we're pregnant"), but no "yes" in the history of the world was as monumental as the one given by a teenage girl over 2,000 years ago.

The Angel Gabriel asked Mary if she would bear God's only Son. With only a moment's hesitation (long enough to ask exactly how this could be), yet most likely frought with equal parts anxiety and hope, she responded, "Yes." The Gospels attribute Mary with a much more eloquent response,

Behold, I am the handmaid of the Lord. Be it done unto me according to thy Word (Luke 1:38).

A yes, though, by any other words would still smell as sweet. And even
though unlike Mary we are born with original sin, and even though 1/2
of all of us are not biologically able to bear a child (a claim I
humbly make fully knowing Gabriel's words to Mary, "For nothing will be
impossible for God" (Luke 1:37)) God approaches us this Advent with the same
questions He offered to Mary many years ago:

Will you let me into your life?

Will you bring me into your homes and your hearts?

Will you bear me, and all that comes with carrying me with you?

Will you prepare for my coming?

Will you deliver me into this world?

God yearns for a positive response from us. He hopes that this year, this Christmas, we will answer with an unequivocal "yes", forever changing our lives and in turn, our world. Like Mary, we may be anxious and fearful about responding in the affirmative. We may even be excited over the prospect of a life with Christ.

But, are we courageous enough to just say yes?

The Wisdom of Advent

I know I'm three Sundays late with this Advent reflection. As mentioned before, time has taken on an altogether new meaning for me. So, I apologize if it comes a bit late (technically 1/2 way) in this glorious season of Advent. But, our God of second chances is also a God of last second comebacks. So I hope that God would agree: it's better late than never.

In addition, I'm not only late, I'm also going to begin this reflection by looking at an event toward the end of the Christmas season. Much like a lesson plan designed by having the end in mind before beginning, I think it's worth knowing where we're headed before we start on our journey. It's in this spirit that I turn to the story of the Three Wise Men and what they can teach us about Advent. (http://www.usccb.org/nab/bible/matthew/matthew2.htm)

The Wise Men offer us a wonderful example of how we should behave during this season of Advent. First, we imagine that they had to prepare for their journey to Bethlehem before starting. Unlike jumping in the car and traveling from St. Petersburg to Tampa or even from Tampa to Jacksonville, we can imagine their trip taking extended time and requiring much more preparation than grabbing their keys. Second, the Wise Men had to make a choice. They had to choose between following what Herod wanted and what their hearts (and God) wanted. Third, they returned to their homes by a different road-- their encounter with Christ changed them in such a way that they could no longer go back to their old ways. They were different because of their Christmas day. Fourth and finally, history knows them as “wise” because of their gifts honoring Christ’s Kingship, instead of merely recognizing his birth.

Can the same adjective, wise, be applied to us during this Advent season? Personally, I want to be considered wise instead of the opposite. When Christmas is over and we’re returning to our everyday lives, I want to be a different person. I want to be someone who saw Christ not just as a way to get presents but as my Savior and King. I want to be a Wise Man, too.

We need to take the example of the Wise Men if we are to make the most out of our Advent preparation:

First, we must prepare for Christmas. This preparation, however, should take a different shape and tone than what society tells us it should entail (http://www.adventconspiracy.org/). We should worship fully. We should spend more time in prayer than usual and the time we do spend should be spent in participating fully, consciously and actively. While carolling we may belt out "Rudolph, the Red-Nose Reindeer" at the top of our lungs, but in Mass we wouldn't dream of even opening our mouths. This Advent, sing. Instead of just praying at the end of the day before going to sleep, maybe we should take Christ's example and rise a bit earlier, go off by ourselves, and begin our day in prayer. Cracking open Sacred Scripture, receiving the Sacrament of Reconciliation, lighting an Advent wreath at home-- whatever you do, do something different and/or extra and do it with your full heart.

Second, we need to recognize that like the Wise Men, we are also presented with a choice about the birth of Jesus. The world tells us that in order to be happy this Christmas we need to spend more money and buy the newest, most expensive gadget. Things are what we want. So, run around to as many stores as possible and buy as much (quantity over quality) as possible so that your precious loved ones will be happy. Our God presents us with a much different choice, one that focuses more on people, relationships and quality than it does on material things. Can you even remember all that you got for Christmas last year? How about five years ago? But, can you remember the people with whom you spent Christmas and what you did? The Wise Men chose, well, wisely. Hopefully we will, too.

Third, Christmas Day will come and hopefully we will come to experience and encounter Christ in a true and meaningful way. Will we be changed forever because of our encounter with Christ on Christmas Day (we will even find time for Church)? Or, will the 26th come as it usually does, seeing us trudge back to the stores, upset with the crowds and even more upset with having to return all of the things that we got but didn't want?

If we can make the right choice and truly prepare for Christmas as the Magi did, spending more time in prayer and less at the malls, giving more of ourselves to people we love and less of our money, if we can recognize the true meaning of Christmas and live our lives according, we just might be considered wise.

Heck, we may even go down in history.

The Essence of Time

Time has taken on an entirely different meaning since the birth of my daughter. Not only is the time of day (especially on weekends) somewhat irrelevant, but time also passes and feels differently than it once did. Sleeping for a few hours at a time can be just as good as a night filled with slumber. Time goes quickly-- didn't I just change her diaper? Time is more precious, too. I try to get as much done as effectively and efficiently as possible so as to get home before the sun sets. Spending time with my daughter and wife is the most important part of my day.

I have come to realize that I do not have time to waste.

But, it's not enough to just spend time with them; I want to spend quality time with them. For instance, I'd rather hold Elizabeth than just be in the same room with her. I'd rather talk to my wife about her day than just passively watch another Diners, Drive-Ins and Dives. I can hold Elizabeth in my arms while talking on the phone or packing my lunch (which takes a bit more than when I use both hands); however, I'd much rather watch her track me with her eyes, read her stories or pat her back to soothe a cry or encourage a burp. I am happy to at least be present. Just like there's a difference between lying down and sleeping, there's a difference between being present and being engaged.

Not to sound silly, but there's a difference between the level of commitment of the chicken and the pig in an eggs and bacon breakfast: the chicken was involved, the pig was committed.

When it comes to husbandry and fatherhood, I do not want to just be involved, I'd much rather be committed.

The same goes for my role as an educator. It's not enough just to keep students busy. It's also not enough just to cover the material. When it comes to teaching, we must be concerned with both the time on task of our students as well as the nature of the tasks on which we are asking them to spend time. Yes, we need to keep students busy; but, we must keep them busy on work that is worth doing.

One of the biggest indicators of student success is their time on task. The more that students are actively engaged throughout the course of a lesson or day, the more they are likely to have learned. This is extremely logical. If students are only on task for 4 out of their 8 hours in school, at the very best they can only learn 4 hours worth of material. Bump up the amount of time that students are being taught, working on labs, participating in discussions and producing work, and you will also increase the amount of learning taking place.

Similarly, we must ensure that this time spent on task is done on more than mere busy work. Learning must be focused on student-centered objectives. Activities must relate back to those objectives and lead to accomplishing others. Lessons should both spiral and scaffold, reviewing past concepts prior to introducing new ones and teaching lower order thinking skills (i.e. define, list, recognize) prior to reaching for higher ones (i.e. analyzing, synthesizing, comparing/contrasting, creating). In the end, students must be able to use their new knowledge in meaningful ways. Units should not necessarily end with a chapter test and the material forgotten after obtaining a particular grade. Students' knowledge should extend beyond the walls of the classroom and school and prepare them for a future of positively impacting our world.

None of this can be accomplished just by running in place or spinning our wheels through worksheets, end of the chapter questions and taking notes off of an overhead. An involved and well behaved group of students is a good first step, but it does not necessarily indicate the occurence of great learning. Not all students learn visually or audibly. Some require moving around (bodily-kinesthetic), incorporating music, working with others (interpersonal) or other non-traditional strategies to learn.

When it comes to education (or parenthood or even being married) time is of the essence. It's not enough to just be involved or present. We must take our presence a step further and be committed and engaged. Doing the first can lead to good things; doing the second can lead to incredible ones.

We must recognize that the essence of time is that it is a gift too valuable to waste.

Just be sure to make time for breakfast, even if it's just eggs with biscuits and gravy...unless, of course, it's chicken flavored.

It's Not About You

Last Friday, October 29 at 8:34 p.m., my wife gave birth to our first child, Elizabeth Anne Zelenka. Three things occurred to me at this moment:
1. There must be a benevolent God
2. I've never been more in love with my wife, Emily and
3. My life will never be the same.

While I won't bore you with the details of my reaffirmed faith in an Almighty, Loving Creator God, or how my love for my wife intensified because of the strength and love she showed throughout the labor process, I will focus on how my life, at that moment, was forever changed.

The night of Elizabeth's birth was a prime example of how my life is no longer about me. As I'm sure all parents can attest, that night was filled with tests and check-ups and heating lamps and measurements and inconsolable cries. In fact, our night was so jammed packed with activity that it was well after 3 a.m. on Saturday morning before mom, dad and baby finally got to sleep. The next day came just as quickly as the previous night was long, by 6 a.m. the Zelenka family was up once again and tending to her many hospital visitors.

Our 2nd "night" as parents was just as sleepless. But, even in a completely sleep exhausted state at 4:30 a.m. on Sunday morning, holding on to my frantically crying daughter, I could almost hear God whisper to me, "Mike, it's not about you anymore." I knew I had to put my own need for sleep aside and instead focus on Elizabeth.

Our days and nights since our three night, two day stint in the hospital have calmed significantly, and Elizabeth, like her mother, holds the key to my heart. I absolutely adore her. So, even though my sleeplessness (and cluelessness) has dwindled, this idea of my life not being about me anymore has lingered.

During my prayer and reflection time over the past four days I have also come to sense a connection between my musing on fatherhood and my other vocation as a Catholic educator: "Mike, it's not about you."

I issue this same message to all Catholic educators-- teachers, administrators, support staff, even parents-- everywhere: "It's not about you."

Teaching must be centered on the student. Gone are the days of a taught curriculum, where the teacher merely covers the material, with little to no regard for individual student performance (that's what Bell Curves are for, right?). Instead, students must learn the material at hand. The central focus of a classroom cannot be the teacher/teaching; it must be the student/learning.

This approach to education puts aside many "old school" tactics: teachers lecturing from a podium and students passively taking notes, punitive pop quizzes meant to "get back" at students, failed tests being dismissed as a lack of student preparation ("I taught the material all last week!") and covering material from a textbook in straight succession from the introduction on page xiv to page 367.

The needs, backgrounds, abilities and temperaments of students must take precedence over the desires of the teacher, or any adult in the educational setting. Teachers must overcome tiredness, angry parents, riffs with colleagues and administrators, or a distaste for a particular subject for the good of student learning.

Time on task has a huge impact on student learning-- it must be maximized and not wasted on an abundance of study halls, homework time during class, or parties for every "holiday". The dignity and value of the student as a child of God must always be maintained, especially during disciplinary situations. Teachers must identify the ways that students, individually, best learn and differentiate their instruction so as to touch on these many and varied multiple intelligences. Lessons need to be analyzed, reorganized, and re-taught based on student performance. Each and every student must be challenged yet given the necessary supports to succeed.

When it comes to education, adults (teachers/administration/support staff and parents alike) must put aside their own egos and focus on the good of the child(ren). Because, much like being a parent, as a teacher it's not about, and can't ever be about, you.

Waiting for an Extra Marshmallow

This past Sunday was one of the fortunate times in the Celebration of the Eucharist that all three readings from the Liturgy of the Word followed a similar theme: perseverance (for last weekend's readings go to: http://www.usccb.org/nab/101710.shtml). God presents us with three wonderful images of perseverance: Moses straining to hold up his arms with Aaron and Hur helping to support his arms as Moses grows weary; an infant listening to the stories and lessons from Sacred Scripture, and a widow persistently asking a judge to side in her favor and eventually receiving a just decision. Our Heavenly Father explicitly tells us that we must persevere in our faith and that if we do, we will, like the widow, receive our just reward.

But, persevering in our faith (or in any aspect of our lives) is difficult. We live in a society and a world that demands speed. Diets should shed double digit pounds in a matter of days; exercise routines should shred fat within a few workouts; food should be received in a hurry, consumed in a hurry, and eaten in huge quantities (unless, of course, we're on a miracle diet promising double digit weight loss in a few days); abridged versions of books should guarantee the same substance of a novel in less words; music should be downloaded instantaneously; and all people should be reachable by cell phone or text at all hours of every day.

Constantly living by this modus operandi, is it any wonder that we expect the same urgency and ease from our spiritual lives? We want many things-- to win in battle, to be equipped for every good work, and for things to go in our favor-- but we do not want to work for them. Likewise, we do not want to wait for them either. Working hard and delaying the gratification of something runs directly against the current of our society-- get anything you want right when you want it.

Working hard was a principle upon which our country was founded. The Puritan work ethic believed that God rewarded those individuals who worked hard enough to deserve it. And whether or not God truly does shower blessings upon those who work hard, it makes sense that working hard toward the attainment of some goal gets us that much closer to achieving it. While we may not become the starting point guard or earn first trombone, working hard for something does pay off.

Similarly, delaying gratification is also healthy. We're taught to eat our food slowly and to wait 10 minutes prior to going back for seconds. If we're still hungry after that time, it's okay to have a second helping. Waiting overnight to press send on a scathingly drafted email response can also have its benefits; looking at our words with a clearer mind can keep us from forwarding an email we would otherwise regret. Holding off on a purchase can also yield dividends: it can allow the price to drop to a more reasonable sale and/or help you to realize if buying the item is really worthwhile. Patience, therefore, is not only a virtue, it can also lead us to success.

If we can just hold on, good things can happen. An experiment conducted in the 1960s at Stanford University revealed that there is a correlation between self-control and future success. The famous "Marshmallow Experiment" offered young children one marshmallow to consume immediately or two if they were willing to wait to eat the first for an undisclosed period of time. In tracking subjects, those who were able to delay gratification at an early age typically scored 200 points higher on their SATs than the impulsive children. Furthermore, the children who waited performed better in school, encountered fewer behavioral problems as adolescents, and led healthier lifestyles later in life. In this case persevering not only resulted in the gratification of another marshmallow, it was a predictor of future success in life. (Click on this link to see a humorous update on the marshmallow test: http://www.allprodad.com/page.php?id=164.)

Perseverance may also point toward another quality, and one of utmost importance to Catholic educators: holiness. For as St. Paul encourages the Hebrews (12:1), "Therefore, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us rid ourselves of every burden and sin that clings to us and persevere in running the race that lies before us." If we can persevere in our faith, and remain true to ourselves and our Heavenly Father in a world that encourages us to sell out and get the quick fix, our just reward will be well worth the wait.

If nothing else, it will be more than an extra marshmallow.

It's For Their Own Good

Last Friday, I had arthroscopic surgery on my knee to repair a torn meniscus. While I wish I could say that this injury was a result of some exciting feat of strength or daring act of kindness, I "tore" it by merely standing up from a squatting position. Torn last month over Labor Day weekend, I had adjusted my lifestyle to accommodate my limiting condition. Not being able to run or workout was initially a hard pill to swallow. But, over the course of the month leading up to my surgery I grew accustomed to doing one-legged workouts, going for walks instead of runs, and coping with not being able to squat past 90 degrees. In fact, in this short time, I became so comfortable with this new way of life that I was worried about this surgical procedure.

Thoughts of "What if something were to go wrong? What would the rehab be like? How much longer would it be before I'd be able to workout, or even just walk normally?" raced through my mind. Even though I knew that this surgery would put me on a path back to my pre-September lifestyle, I was reluctant to go through with the procedure.

Similarly, just yesterday I removed the very large post-ob padding and bandage that had covered my knee for five straight days. Even though I knew that this would be yet another step toward my recovery, I felt comforted by its protective covering and hesitated exposing my repaired knee. "Would I be able to sleep? What if a student bumped into the next day? Would I feel wobbly without it?"

These are two examples from the past week that point to a much more important issue than my pending rehabilitation: change, even change that we know is good for us, is often met with resistance.

Think of a new dieter and his/her attempts to steer away from sweets, the smoker doing his/her best to kick the habit, or even a child before taking the training wheels off of a bicycle. All of these changes are good; but all are also hard. They can also be scary. In many cases, the difficulty involved in making a change and the fear associated with the uncharted territory of change can immobilize us. It can keep us from changing. Or, mid-change, it can send us running back to the familiarity of our past selves.

But, as Catholic educators we must embrace change. We must fight the urge to announce "but we've always done it this way" and remain entrenched in our past mediocrities. We must embrace each new school year as another chance to improve on the successes of the past one. Much hype has surrounded the recent documentary, "Waiting for Superman" and our educational system here in the United States. Staggering statistics have surfaced: the United States ranks 10th in Reading Literacy, 12th in College Completion Rates, 17th in Science Literacy, and 24th in Math Literacy of all industrialized nations. 67% of our nation's 4th graders read below their grade level. 25% of America's seniors don't graduate from High School and of those that graduate, only 35% read proficiently.

This is not to say that every school, and more specifically every Catholic School, falls into these same percentages. However, our educational system in general is in dire need of change. Changes in our approaches to instruction, administration, parenting, grading, planning, discipline-- everything are essential if our students are to reverse these horrifying statistics. If we continue to do things the same way we've always done them, we should expect to get the same results we've always gotten.

We must be open to change and open to the fact that change, no matter how good it is for us or our children, will be difficult.

In the final chapter of John's Gospel (21:18), Jesus says to Peter, "Amen, amen, I say to you, when you were younger, you used to dress yourself and go where you wanted; but when you grow old, you will stretch out your hands, and someone else will dress you and lead you where you do not want to go." Jesus concludes this message to Peter by saying, "Follow me."

Luckily for us, Peter and countless other followers of Jesus were willing to change. We, too, must have this same openness of spirit if our children are to succeed.

Changing, in this case, is for their own good.